3 Tools For Dealing With Negative People

I do my best to minimize the amount of time I spend with negative people, but sometimes these situations are unavoidable.  Often times there can be negativity in your family or the people you work with.  I'm still working through managing my reactions to some of the negativity that I come in contact with and below are a few of the techniques I use to work through it.  When used properly and consistently, I have found great success from them!

  1. Random Acts of Positivity: When there is a person that I spend a consistent amount of time with that I know is negative, I try to sprinkle in random acts of positivity to them when possible.  I compliment them from what seems "out of nowhere" and talk about positive and uplifting stories I've heard.  I have even sent them inspirational memes with a caption of something to the effect of "This made me think of you, hope you're having a great day!"  Just one positive thing, no matter how small can elevate a person's entire mood.  When someone is feeling happy, inspired or more confident, they are much less likely to spread negativity.  So go ahead and spread your positivity wherever you can!
  2. Do NOT Engage: Two ways that people spread their emotional poison are via complaints and gossip.  I am definitely going to elaborate on both complaining and gossip in other blog posts, but just a sneak peek...these two things are way more detrimental to your emotional health than you think.  When people complain to me, I acknowledge them, but I do not engage or ask to hear more.  I let them know that they have been heard, but I don't fall for their cries to fuel their fire.  And let's be clear, there is a difference between someone going through hardship and looking to speak to someone rather than just complaining for the sake of complaining.  With gossip, I also do not reciprocate.  I acknowledge that they have been heard but again, do not fuel their fire.  I often say things like "To each their own", "I'm really in no place to judge," or "Well as long he/she is happy, that is all that matters."  With gossip, people are most likely touching on something that they themselves are insecure about.  By not fueling the fire of peoples' complaints or gossip, they will eventually give up spewing them on you, because what they are really looking for is someone to jump on their ship of negativity and essentially acknowledge that what they are doing is ok.  Misery loves company, and if you don't provide them that company, they'll move on and spread their poison to someone else.
  3. Shield Yourself Literally (Well Almost): This one might seem a little odd, but you'll soon realize that I am really into visualizations, analogies and personifying things.  You'll start to notice that the when people spew negativity, it really has nothing to do with you at all.  It has everything to do with their insecurities and how they feel about themselves.  Try to remember that in the moment.  When people start projecting their negativity on me, I no joke, picture myself wearing a helmet and protective armor, and imagine their negative comments bouncing off my protective gear.  I imagine that I am preventing their poison from taking hold on me and seeping into my brain.  Each time I slay down a piece of poison, I congratulate myself and consider myself much stronger knowing that I am not going to be torn down by those comments.  This "technique" (if you even want to call it that), requires your awareness.  You'll soon realize that awareness is extremely important!

The three techniques I just listed above may seem silly and not very profound, but I promise that if you use them consistently, you will find that you will have a much easier time shielding yourself from negativity, and that a portion of the negativity you currently encounter will disappear all together!

What do you do when encountering negativity?  I'd love to hear your comments below!